No class this morning but this afternoon wasnapos;t canceled so, Iapos;m finishing up the homework this morning while Iapos;m at work and then maybe Iapos;ll get a nap before class at 2....so, letapos;s see, that means I need to be awake at noon to get a shower.
Then this evening is the meet and greet at the super mall.
I�think that mediation for us would be a very good idea. Itapos;s really hard for me to let go of a lot of the anger and learn to trust again.
Iapos;m having a hard time not pushing conversation and reconciliation. I�want us to be better. Intellectually, I know itapos;s going to take time. Emotionally, I�have knots in my stomach and knots in my shoulders. Unfortunately, I donapos;t know how to get us into counseling without us being on the same coast, so it waits. I�donapos;t want to just drop the conversation about where we are going and what we can expect from each other in the interim.
I�know that the ideal is to have no expectations. I canapos;t manage that and plan for the future. I guess what Iapos;m asking for here is that I can continue to have the expectation that we will continue to work on and talk about our relationship. I want to talk more about our additional relationships and how they effect us. That seems to be our biggest conflict. Well, mine at least because you donapos;t seem to have any issue with who I�see and when. Iapos;m not saying that I want you to have issues with who I see. I�think that finding out why I have issues with who you see is a good idea but it is not solely that Iapos;m jealous, possessive and crazy.
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